The most commonly seen smileys ...

:-)
Your basic smiley.
This smiley is used to inflect a sarcastic or joking statement since we can't hear voice inflections through text. Or, it just might represent how the sender is feeling (happy).

(-:
Your basic southpaw smiley.
Many of the examples in this UNofficial FAQ can be modified to express that the user is left-handed. Some of them, however, cannot be so adapted because of the limitations of keyboards.

;-)
The "Winkie" or "Winkey."
This smiley can mean many things, so the context in which it is used is important for its interpretation. Its user may havejust made a flirtatious or sarcastic remark. This can be a type of a "don't hit me for what I just said" smiley. It is often used to show remonstration without malice toward the recipient.

(-;
The left-handed "Winkie."

:-(
The Frowning smiley. (Now that's an oxymoron!)
The user is disappointed or did not like that last statement and is now expressing a pout; or, s/he is anxious, depressed or otherwise upset about something.

:-<
"I'm really sad."

%-(
Watch out for this smiley!
Angrily frowning, this one really means trouble!

:-I
"I'm indifferent about that" smiley.
Better than a pout but not quite as good as a basic smiley.

:->
The user just made a really biting, sarcastic remark - one which might require more than a mere :-) to help the recipient recover.

>:->
Devilish remark smiley.

>;->
Devilish Winky smiley.
"The Devil made me do it!" - Flip Wilson

@:-)
Granny Smiley ... I wonder if there's any apple pie in the refrig?

:-)~
Drooling.

-:-)
=:-)
Punk rocker smileys.

-:-(
=:-(
Real punk rockers don't smile.
(Mr. T from The "A-Team?")

%+{
This one's been in a fight.

X-(
This one's unconscious.

:-/
:-\
Undecided smileys.
Also used to depict skepticism.

~~:-(
This one's been flamed.

:-&
Tongue-tied ... or at least has a definite slur in its speech.

:-S
Confused, or incoherent.

X-#
This one's a deadhead.

<:-)
The dunce.
Someone thinks you aren't "playing with a full deck" if they send this one to you.

%-6
Someone's saying they think you're braindead with this smiley.

=:-)
Now, "You're being called a hosehead."

*:o)
Bozo!

B:-)
Sunglasses on forehead.

::-)
Reading glasses on forehead.

B-)
Wears horn-rimmed glasses.

(:)-)
Scuba diver smiley.

O-)
Snorkeling smiley(or, Megaton Man on Patrol!)

3:]
Nice doggie.

3:[
C U J O

:]
Bulldog smiley.

:-(=
"I am the Walrus ..." koo-KOO-ka-CHOO!

8:]
Magilla Gorilla smiley.
Use this one when you've just made a monkey out of yourself.

{:\/
... if it looks like a duck ...

----ä8X==|
... unless you think it looks like a cat instead.

:-[
Vampyre smiley.
Click here for 101 vampyre Web sites.

:-E
Vampyre with a really nasty overbite.

:-F
Vampyre with a broken fang; or, a buck-toothed vampyre who sneezed and bit itself!

[:]
Robot smiley.

:-:
Mutant smiley.

d:-)
Baseball fan.

(:-)
Wearing a bicycle helmet.

C=:-)
Chef, or baker.

:-©K
:-©K
:-©K
:-©K
A barbershop quartet.

=|:-)=
"Honest Abe" smiley: Abraham Lincoln.

=|:-)}
Uncle Sam.

[:-(
An Inquisitor; a medieval monk.

+-:-)
Papal smiley.

+:-)
Theologian (priest).

*<:-}
Santa Claus

@:-)
Sultan of Smiley;
Alladin; or, a real swami.

:-)   8
Ahem ... Big girl smiley ... perhaps inspired by a famous "girl" from the silver screen?
O :-)
The angelic smiley.

:-Y
"Psst! Hey! Over here."

:-|
Harmonica player.

|-I
Sleeping.

|-O
|^O
Snoring ... sound card required.

,-O
Yawning.

:-{
:-#
Doctor Watson smileys.
Smileys sporting bushy moustaches.

:-{)
King Farouk ... van Dyke beard smiley ...

{:-)
Burt Reynolds.
Smiley wearing a rug.

}:-(
Same as above ... in an updraft

:>)
Jimmy Durante smiley
Big-nosed.

:^)
Pinocchio smiley.
Having a long nose; or, lying. Also a smiley with nose broken to the left.

:v)
Smiley with nose broken to the right.

:_)
Tongue-in-cheek ...

:-!
Has foot-in-mouth disease.

:-~)
Smiley a bad cold.

:%)%
A case of acne.

:-(#)
Wears braces.

|-<>
Pucker up!

`:-)
Shaved off one eyebrow off this morning.

,:-)
Same as above other side.

>:-I
Mr. Spock .

:-7
Wry.

:-8(
Ivy League school smiley.
Condescending. Curiously enough, also called the Easter Island smiley.

:-D
Laughing aloud (at you!); or, talks too much.

:'-(
Crying ... sadly.

:'-)
Crying ... happily.

:-@
Screaming.

:-P
:-Ptttthhhhhhp! "Bronx cheer" smileys.
Someone's giving you "the raspberry."

:-9
"Yummy!"

:-6
:-Q
"Yuck!"

:-*
Ooh! That's sour!

:-o
Uh oh!

(8-o
"Oh, no! It's Mr. Bill!"

8-O
"Omigawd!" ... (Right after doing rm -rf *)

:-|
Who cares?

:-Q
Cigarette dangling from mouth.

:-?
Pipe smoker smiley.

>8->
"Pro Junior" smiley.
Fans of 60's and 70's underground comix can appreciate this one.

:*)
#-)
Smileys with their snoots full - Don't let them drive!

q:*)
q#-)
Bubba smileys with their snoots full.

%-\
%-/
Hungover smileys. (Ssshhh! Please don't shout.)

>:x
Easter Bunny.

@(:
Marvin the Martian" ... from Bugs Bunny cartoons.

E-:-)
Amateur radio (ham) operator.

[:-)
Wears a Walkman.

(:-I
Egghead ... similar to indifferent.

(-:|:-)
Siamese twins .

:)
Dwarf , or midget .

@=
Plays Nuclear War .

:-$
Banker.

{
Alfred Hitchcock.

C|:=
Charlie Chaplin.

p
|-(
van Gogh.

%\V
Pablo Picasso ...

8 :-I
Your local Unix wizard.

C=}>;*{))
Mega-smiley: A drunk, devilish chef with a toupee in an updraft, a mustache, and a double chin!

*<(:~)
The cold smiley, with a toboggon on for winter.

:)
(:
Basic happy smileys.

:]
The gleeb (or "gleep") ... a friendly little smiley who will gladly be your buddy.

:(
Pouting.

:[
A real bummer.

:I
This smiley was called on in the classroom and doesn't know the answer.

:{
Busted again! Could also be used to show a milky moustache.

:D
Laughing.

:O
Little Pavarotti; shouting smiley.

:Q
This one's having its temperature taken; home sick from school.

:'(
This one's crying. (sniff!)

|I
Sound asleep.